Mandy and I are very lucky. Ollie is six months old now, and except for a handful of days when we needed family or friends to babysit him, we watch him grow every moment. I don't think many parents spend more time with their child than we do.
Sure, nowadays in Western countries, men also have a couple of weeks of baby leave. But after three months or so, both father and mother have to resume work. Often, the baby then goes to childcare or grandparents. Depending on the work schedule, this means a baby needs one to five days of daycare. The parent with the fewest hours on contract sees the baby the most. The full-time worker misses more than one-third of the baby's development during workdays.
I'm sure a lot of people don't mind at all leaving for work. Being 24/7 with your baby is not easy. There's no: I want to work on this big project, and because I'm at home, I can finish everything on my to-do list in one day. Apart from nap times, a baby needs constant attention. So, being able to go to work and get things done, and to be among colleagues is understandably something people need.
But for us, as entrepreneurs, we chose not to bring Ollie to childcare. Most days he goes with us to work. Sometimes he'll sleep in his baby-caming-bed. Sometimes he sleeps in a baby wrap while we are working. Sometimes he's restless and cries. Every other moment, he's awake and enjoying. When we have a lot of work to do, taking care of a baby in our workshop is not easy. We take turns deciding who has to take care of our crying son, depending on the priority of tasks.
The extra fuss is worth every little frustration. Because in the grand scheme of life, a baby period is over in the snap of a finger. Let's say a person will live to 80; the first year of someone's life is just 1,25% of their life. And the older our son gets, the less dependent he will be on us. Every 'first moment' happens only once. The first tooth, the first time crawling, the first bite of food, etc. If you miss those moments, you'll have to do it with the second-hand moments. Not quite the same as being there for the milestones.
Although being a couple while raising a child and building a business is hard work and long days, I wouldn't want it any other way. We might not be rich with money, but we are rich in a currency that is far greater in my opinion: attention. With the amount of time we can spend with our son, for as long as it lasts, I think we are in the top 1% of all parents in the world. And that's something I'm proud of.